Transdimensional Archives

 
[See Profiles of A New Team for disclaimer]

Pointing Fingers
By Crypt

The Spice Club members were gathered in the park after their Slumber Day. The Power Rangers teleported down to Earth to greet them.

"So, how do you guys feel?" T.J. asked.

"We feel much better; you won't believe it," Jenny replied.

"Ready to go back up into space?" Ashley asked.

"No, no, no," the Spices replied at once.

"We'll stay down to Earth," the Cryptkeeper said.

"Well, at least come up for breakfast," Carlos suggested.

But before they could make a move, a familiar voice filled the air.

"You're not going anywhere."

Jenny let out an annoyed sigh. "Ecliptor, you're early. Are you aware that it's only five o'clock in the morning, and that the sun isn't even up yet?"

"The early bird catches the worm," Ecliptor said. "So what's up? Are you ready to fight?"

But before Jenny could answer, there was yet another interruption. Some yellow light gathered together next to Ecliptor and took the shape of none other than . . . Scorpina.

"Scorpina, long time no see," Jenny said. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to point fingers," Scorpina told her.

"Again," Sal muttered.

"Ecliptor, you can't fight these guys; they're demons," Scorpina said.

"Demons? They don't look like demons," Ecliptor said.

"Of course they don't. They disguise the fact until the perfect time, then they destroy everyone in sight."

"Scorpina," Jenny snapped, "that is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard."

"What makes you think we're demons?" Spinal asked.

"Tonfa Spice, you did throw a Halloween party at an abandoned morgue a couple of years back, right?" Scorpina asked.

"Right," Jenny replied. "There were only seven of us back then."

"And you did say that the place was possessed, right?"

"I only said that to scare the shit out of you. I just didn't think it would work as well as it did." Jenny bursted out a chuckle.

"But I saw the evidence myself. Why did I find Marvin lying in Hallie's lap, his eyes poked out? And why did Hallie have blood all over her thumbs? That tells me that Hallie poked Marvin's eyes out."

"She did not poke my eyes out," Marvin said. "Did you see her poke my eyes out?"

"No," Scorpina admitted.

"All right then, so how can you say she poked my eyes out?"

There was an awkward silence. Scorpina continued her accusations.

"What about that monster I saw after you guys collapsed at dawn? You know, that evil spirit. And why did you two keep on walking after I burned you to a crisp?"

"We don't do that demon crap anymore," the Cryptkeeper said. "Killing monsters became too boring for us, so we became warriors. Now we can get into a REAL fight!!"

"He's right," Jenny said. "It was kind of dull, sneaking up behind a monster with an axe. Let's just say that we did die on that fateful Halloween night. Even without those spirits, we would've been dead anyway."

"What are you talking about?" Scorpina asked.

"That's why you came to my party uninvited," Jenny continued. "You were going to destroy us at dawn."

"When did you find this out?"

"We knew it all along. That's the only reason why I moved the party to the morgue. But don't get me wrong; it's not like we wanted to get on with our lives. Our lives were miserable; we were constantly abused by the human race. Even without those spirits, and without you there to kill us, we would have killed ourselves that night. The Halloween party was our last dose of fun."

"Let me get this straight," Ecliptor interrupted. "You all threw your worthless lives away just to gain your special powers?"

"We weren't expecting special powers," Hallie said.

"Since Scorpina and her goons were so scared at the party, we were resurrected with these powers to fight off the evil aliens," the Cryptkeeper explained. "And boy, we've never felt better."

"Speaking of the party, where's Jasmine?" Scorpina asked.

"Who?" Jenny asked.

"Jasmine."

"Oh! She . . . retired. She's not one of us anymore."

"So how did your team grow?" Carlos asked.

"Well, many more suicidals wandered by the morgue, told us that they wanted to join, and that was that," Jenny explained. "All it took was a kiss, which would pass on the spirit that provided their powers."

"Of course, a few of us already had powers before joining," C.C. said. "Like Spinal, for instance."

Spinal waved innocently.

"And now here we are, now the Spice Club," Jenny said. "We couldn't have felt better."

"Of course, the agility thing took a little work," Earl said.

"We were abused by Earth's inhabitants," Jenny went on. "But now, we will continue to be abused by the scum of the universe."

"So you admit it?" Scorpina asked. "Are you dead?"

"Do you call it dead?" Jenny said. "I call it possessed, or spirited . . . so to speak."

"Yes, you're dead," Scorpina yelled. "No wonder you call yourselves the Spice Club. Spices are nothing but rotten plants that are dug up from the soil, just like all of you."

"But Spices add flavor to everything, including your life," Curly said.

"Well, I need to go," Scorpina said, "before I end up like you."

She disappeared with that.

"The nerve of that woman to accuse you of being dead," Ashley said.

"Well, to be perfectly frank," Jenny told her, "she's right."

The Rangers stared at the Spices, confused.

"You mean you guys are, like, zombies?" Carlos asked.

"Yes; we're zombies, ghouls, the walking dead, whatever you want to call it," Jenny replied. "We were never a part of the world out there. With a few exceptions, the living can't be trusted."

"And neither can the dead," Ecliptor said. "Now that the Rangers know your dark secret, you'll just have to break forces."

"Don't let our secrets change anything, Rangers," Jenny said. "We've known each other all this time and we've made a great team. We were dead then, just as we are now. Nothing has to change."

"Right," said T.J. "We must respect people for who and what they are, even if they are dead. We'd even respect Ecliptor here if he hadn't kept trying to kill us."

"Come on, Tonfa Spice," Ecliptor said. "I don't have all day. Are you gonna fight me or not?"

"Uh, we'll watch from the ship," Carlos said nervously.

The Rangers teleported away. The Spices stared into the sky.

"Well?" Ecliptor asked impatiently.

"All right," Jenny sighed. "I'll fight you . . . only if my sister can fight with me."

"What!?"

"What's the matter, Ecliptor? Can't handle two of us?"

"Can't handle two innocent little girls?" Hallie chimed in, blowing Ecliptor a kiss. Jenny looked at her as if to say, "That wasn't necessary."

"I can handle all of you at once," Ecliptor said.

"Ooooh," the Spices muttered.

Jenny chuckled. "You overestimate yourself."

"Ooooh, I love you, Ecliptor, you're so scrumptious!" Hallie cried.

"Scrumptious?" Ecliptor asked.

"Yeah. What if I told you that we wanted to eat you for dessert?"

"Nobody eats me."

"But you're so sweet! You look like candy. Come on, Sis, let's eat him!" Hallie said.

"You do, and I'll give you a lot more than candy," Ecliptor warned.

"Oooooooooooohhhhhhh," the others sang. "That's gotta hurt."

The sisters took a fighting stance. Ecliptor took a fighting stance of his own. The sisters circled their foe. Hallie stayed close to Jenny's side. Jenny gave her a gentle shove as if to say, "Go on the other side of him and confuse him." Ecliptor turned back and forth to them. When the time was right, Jenny rushed at him and threw a punch. Ecliptor blocked it, then slapped her arm upward and punched her in the chest. She doubled over instantly. In a second, she was back on her feet. Hallie poked at Ecliptor with her finger. When Ecliptor turned, Hallie gave him an upward swipe with her fan blade. Ecliptor staggered back, then glared at Hallie and gave her a backhand to the face, knocking her back. The other Spices gasped.

"Ecliptor, that was so mean," the Cryptkeeper said. "Who'd think that you actually have the nerve to hit a little girl like that?"

"Yeah," Jenny added. "I wouldn't be surprised if it was you who kidnapped Andros's sister."

Ecliptor said nothing.

"Well," Jenny said cheerfully. "My turn."

She aimed her sticks at Ecliptor and threw several pairs of fireballs at him. With each fireball, she yelled, "Hiyah!" at the top of her lungs. Ecliptor took the damage from the attacks and shot a larger fireball of his own right out of his eyes. Jenny quickly threw her arms up to shield herself. Ecliptor chuckled.

"Of course, only a dead person could block that attack. But you don't have to be dead in order to do this!"

Suddenly, his head floated right out of his body and floated around, firing energy blasts at the sisters.

"Look who's ahead of the game now," Ecliptor said.

He fired one more energy blast which sent the girls doubling over. Jenny slowly made her way over to Hallie. Then she turned to Ecliptor and smiled.

"Ecliptor, you're gonna lose your head if you don't pull yourself together," she said sweetly. Then she whispered into Hallie's ear, "You get the head while I fight the body."

Hallie nodded, then went after Ecliptor's head. Jenny fought the rest of him and still had a bit of trouble. Ecliptor constantly slashed her chest with his sword. Hallie was jumping up and down trying to grab the head. Finally, she succeeded. She grasped in firmly between her palms and looked at it. After a moment, she kissed it right on the lips. She looked up and smiled.

"He is licorice!" she cried.

Out of nowhere, the head zapped her in the throat. Then it floated back and connected with Ecliptor's body.

"I didn't think it would be so easy," he said.

"It's not," Jenny said. "We're just being nice to you 'cause we love you."

"Grrr!" Ecliptor growled.

The sisters laughed. Jenny turned to Hallie.

"That's what we're doing wrong," she said. "He's waiting for us to make the move so that he could counterattack."

"So what can we do?" asked Hallie.

"Just hang back. Let him make the mistakes."

Hallie nodded, then went back into the field behind Ecliptor. Jenny held her ground, waiting patiently. Ecliptor waited as well.

"What are you waiting for?" he asked. "Come and get me."

"Wait a minute!" Jenny cried. "You wanted to fight me. So fight me. Don't wait for me to fight you."

Ecliptor sighed, then charged at her. Jenny smiled, then whacked him with her flaming stick, stopping him dead. She followed with a kick to the knee, then another to the face. Finally, she gave him a punch to the face, then the chest, then did a reverse cartwheel, kicking him back. Ecliptor stood up.

"Is that the best you can do?"

"I dunno; there's plenty more where that came from," Jenny replied in a sing-song voice, grinning.

Hallie ran up to Ecliptor and gave him a slice in the back. Ecliptor, in response, gave her a back kick.

"Come on, Candy Spice, use those combos!" Jenny cried.

Hallie shrugged her shoulders. Jenny ran up and hooked her arms under Ecliptor's shoulders, then pulled backward. Ecliptor grabbed Jenny's shoulders and pulled back as well. They struggled to throw each other. Ecliptor managed to lift Jenny a few feet off the ground. As she screamed, she forced her way back down. Hallie was jumping up and down wildly.

"Psst, Hallie," the other Spices called.

When Hallie turned, they gestured for her to attack Ecliptor. Hallie ran up and attacked with a side kick. Jenny let out a scream as she and Ecliptor fell over. Jenny planted both feet on his stomach and eventually threw him over her.

"Now that's sister teamwork," the Cryptkeeper whispered.

The sisters advanced on Ecliptor, who stood up and backed up.

"Going somewhere?" Jenny asked.

"I'm going to tear your head from your shoulders and rip your heart out!" Ecliptor shouted.

"Tell that to someone who cares!" Hallie shouted. "You can't kill us! We're already dead!"

"She's right," Jenny added. "Fight's over, Candyman! You can either walk away peaceful, or in pieces. Your choice."

Ecliptor grabbed Jenny by the neck and threw her over his shoulder. Hallie bombarded him with a swarm of deadly blows to the body. Jenny ran up and gave him a rough shove. Ecliptor stood up angrily.

"I'll be back!" he yelled. Then he disappeared.

"Yeah, get outta here, ya big loser," Jenny said. "I fought you; I hope you're satisfied!"

"I am," Hallie said. "He is soooo fine!"

"Hey, let's go out for a pizza," the Cryptkeeper suggested.

"I could be wrong, but don't we need money?" Spinal asked.

"Yeah; we are running awfully low," Hanim added.

"I'll fix it somehow. I'll . . . work at McDonald's," Jenny said.

The others laughed, then started walking to the Surf Spot.

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